Thursday, May 31, 2018

The first time...

I've decided to go through all my exploits, starting with the first one after the divorce. Even though my ex was a serial cheater, I could not bring it upon myself to even consider sex with anyone other than him until the divorce was final. I don't know if it was some inner longing to fix things or just general stupidity. Either way, I waited. Too long. And I was desperate to have sex. When I was married, we had sex every day, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day. That was never our problem. His drinking, lying, cheating and abuse were the problems. But I digress.... When I finally decided it was time, I picked an idiot. No, really. He was and is a dumbass. It was someone that I meet through a good friends husband. I'll call him "The Mistake". I never really liked him as a person for a lot of reasons. But on this occasion, my hormones got the best of me. We had seen each other at a friends house. Somehow or another he dm'ed me about a conversation that was had by us all. The conversation quickly turned flirtatious. Against my better judgement, I gave in to the flirting. I don't know if it was because I was generally horny, or I just wanted to have sex with someone other than my ex. He came over to my house after he was done work. We didn't make much small talk, but got right down to it. The sex was just okay, nothing spectacular. In all honesty, I couldn't wait for it to be over. He was definitely not my type. He was heavyset, hairy and just plain gross. He had an average sized dick, it was the only skinny thing about him. It was over pretty quickly. As he was leaving, he noticed a blanket with my work's logo on it. Y'all. This bastard says to me "Oh, that's where my girl works." 'Scuse me? I questioned him and his story was that they just live together, have a kid together but they're not together. Same bullshit story my ex used to spew. I showed his fucking ass to the door and took a very long, hot shower. The lesson I learned from this encounter was to be more selective and ask questions about their living arrangements. I don't ever want to get caught up in a situation like that again. But wait, there's more. And I'll catch you up on that next time!

Sunday, May 20, 2018

Welcome

    I've been debating on starting this blog for awhile. I'll start by giving you my back story on how I became Single and Ready to Flamingle. I was married for almost 20 years. During that time we went through a lot. We have a beautiful daughter together, and try to co-parent effectively. We split up when I caught him cheating. Again. I went from being a stay at home mom to a full time corporate cog. I love my job but it took some time to get used to my new life.
    I finally decided it was time to start dating in the fall of 2017. It's been a roller coaster ride of craziness ever since then. I've learned that I have no desire to settle down with anyone right now. I'm happy just flamingling my little heart out. I will not be naming the men I have encountered by their given names. Each of them gets a nickname according to their profession, demeanor or sexual ability.
    Stay tuned because I'm just getting started!!